Exharks #5 - Drifters

 

Dogoro brought the Sky Shark to a halt about five hundred miles away from where Sustra was held captive. He could feel her now, sense her on the very edges of his mystical detection. Dogoro wasn’t tired, exactly, even after a several day binge of piloting the ship, but he still wished to gather his energies and make sure he was in top form. Meanwhile, they were still banking on finding some city where they could exchange Bobbi’s gems for credits or cash, and see if the Drifter Network was active out here. Fortunately, the Shard they were currently in, a large region of woods broken up by spots of farmland, looked familiar to Dogoro. He and Sustra had passed through it before taking the Drifter assignment to battle the very vampire they were hunting.

Dogoro took a little time to locate the city where they’d taken the mission. The settlement was only a few dozen miles away, and he parked the Sky Shark a few miles outside its limits. The city hosted a few species of Demihumans, canines and felines and apes mostly, but it wasn’t uncommon to see other species of travelers come through, especially Drifters in transit. The locals spoke a few languages, but Common had reached out here as well. Sharkerbob was able to give Bobbi Common, whilst Dogoro had his own Translation Spells to help with language, as well as absorbing Common itself.

After some debate, Dogoro opted to go with Bobbi, whilst Sharkerbob held down the fort. Bobbi let him keep an enchanted diamond sword, while Dogoro cast a shield spell over the Sky Shark, and the two were off, Bobbi wearing Dogoro as the magic hat flew them into town.

The settlement looked surprisingly like a modern Earth city, a few skyscrapers in its center, with suburbs flowing outward from there in a series of looping subdivisions. Technology appeared to have advanced to the point of flat panel televisions, but personal computers were apparently not in common use. More interestingly, there were a number of humanoid metal beings, appearing like moving chrome statues, who were tasked with some of the more common labor jobs of hauling things around and assisting in maintenance tasks. Bobbi couldn’t tell if they were robots or golems; their bodies were seamless, with no obvious joint lines, and moved with the supple ease of flesh, but they were clearly some kind of otherwise solid metal.

Once they were at the edge of town, Dogoro set the two down, canceling his flight spell. Apparently, flying freely through the city was considered a bit suspect. Bobbi didn’t mind the walk, though, striding at a steady pace with the use of a Speed Potion to triple her walking speed.

“So,” said Bobbi as she jogged along towards the city’s main business district. “What’s your real feelings on all this characters and authors stuff?”

“The idea of being an Author’s character is not out of the bounds of belief for me,” said Dogoro. “I have seen and experienced enough that it isn’t the strangest possibility for the divine. And it would explain how the Frontier could function, despite how haphazardly stitched together it was. We already knew the theory that it was formed by the will of gods from various realities trying to save their worlds from disaster. A Creator God is an Author of a sort, so what difference is it really?”

“And Sharker?”

“I don’t know what to think of him just yet. For now, he is useful to me to save Sustra. I don’t think he has an ill heart, but after we save her, I’m not sure I want to stick with him. He seems quite the aimless one.”

“Yeah,” Bobbi sighed. “Not that I’m one to talk.”

“Hrmph. Nor I, I must admit.”

“Aimless Bros Unite!” she said with a grin. Once they got far enough into town to start seeing shops, they looked for anything resembling a pawn shop or jewelry store. It didn’t take too long, surprisingly enough. Bobbi had already popped out a sack and deposited some gems inside it, just so it wouldn’t look like she was magicking them out of thin-air when she presented them to the jewelers. 

***

The jeweler, a wily catfolk merchant, had pointed out the precious gems were not exactly precious in this new world of fantastical biomes. The jewelry shop barely scraped by on even the most pristine of gems. And Bobbi’s diamonds and emeralds would barely fetch pennies at an artificer’s station! Still, Bobbi hit her with the puppy dog eyes, and the merchant could maybe find it in her heart to give her the higher sales rate if she was willing to bulk sell her whole stash.

Before Dogoro could argue the point, Bobbi plopped the whole bag down on the counter and grinned. The cat merchant quirked an eyebrow at her, now more suspicious at Bobbi’s eagerness to sell. She groused a bit as she inspected the gems, managing to barely keep a poker face as she realized just how finely cut and pure the gems actually were. She then seemed even more stumped at Bobbi’s quick acceptance of her initial offer.

Dogoro sighed and cut in, startling the jeweler, and managed to get at least a little more on the upsell. Under normal circumstances, he would have fought longer, scoffing at the cat woman clearly ripping them off. But it was Bobbi’s treasure to waste, and he had no patience to be doing this all day.

Finally, they left with what Dogoro was certain was still enough to hire some help for at least an afternoon. Bobbi left the merchant with a cheerful and disarming thank you that left the cat swearing she absolutely must have gotten ripped off somehow, and yet finding herself unable to doubt she’d just scored a mint! Just to be safe the merchant locked the gems in a safe for further inspection, but was already grinning at the potential profits.

“You are an astonishingly poor haggler,” gruffed Dogoro as the two strode down the street.

“Gimme a break, Minecraft didn’t exactly have a robust trade mechanic.”

“What exactly is Minecraft, anyway?”

“A great way to waste days your life,” said Bobbi. “Turn here?”

“Yes, another mile down, and we’ll reach the Drifter’s Outpost.”

“So, Drifters are basically wandering mercenaries, right?”

“We do all sorts of odd jobs, but yes, combat is a part of that. Lots of monsters to slay, lots of rogues and criminals to take down. There are regions of the Frontier that are quite stabilized by now, but even more areas are still wild and untamed, or fraught with war.”

“Must be tough,” said Bobbi. 

“Hrmph. As I said, there are plenty of other odd jobs to take. Deliveries through dangerous zones, guarding caravans, consultation work, exploration and research to distant areas. If you’re really strapped for cash, and just need some basic work to tide you over, some branches can also try to hook you up with seasonal labor, although that’s really not what they’re for.”

“Sounds nice,” said Bobbi. She summoned a pickaxe. “Hey, I do have mining experience if it comes to that!”

“If breathing coal dust sounds like your calling, by all means,” Dogoro said.

They came to a stop in front of an office that looked for all the world like a DMV. A few people were lingering around in the lobby, while there were only two people manning the counters. One was a hound-like demihuman, some kind of jowly pitbull. The other was the only bird-like demihuman she’d seen to so far, a very tall, peacock-like figure. Both looked at Bobbi with casual interest as she stepped inside.

“Allow me to do the talking this time,” said Dogoro. “Ho, there! I require assistance in dealing with a monster most foul!”

The pitbull man blinked, slightly startled by Dogoro’s boisterousness, but the peacock didn’t even flinch. With a flap of his wing, he gestured the two over. “Alright, what kind of monster?”

“A most foul kind!” said Dogoro, wriggling a bit on Bobbi’s head. “A vampiric fiend that drains the blood of magical entities!”

“Mmmm.” The peacock had a surprisingly modern flat-panel computer terminal at his station. He tapped at his keyboard with little thumbs protruding from the arch of his wings. With a banal tone, he said, “Ah, yes. That one. Most troublesome. Several Drifters have been sent to deal with her over the years, and none have returned. The whole area around the fiends’ tower has been evacuated for a hundred miles, which seems to be the fiends range limit, for unknown reasons.”

“Ah,” said Dogoro. “Well, having personally faced the creature, that is probably for the wisest.”

Bobbi, meanwhile, just pursed her lips and put her hands in her pockets, settling her weight back, and resigning herself to being Dogoro’s hatrack while he did all the negotiating.

“Mmm.” The peacock typed a bit more, and said, “Ah, yes. Sustra and Dogoro, I take it.” He glanced at Bobbi, then back to his screen. “I am going to assume the young lady beneath you is not Sustra. New partner?”

“A new ally! My partner is in need of rescue!”

“Fallen to the fiend, did she?”

“Yes! And I aim to get her back!”

“Mmm.” More typing. “Unfortunately, after your failed attempt, no further Drifters within reasonable distance have taken the job. It has been upgraded to an extreme risk.” He paused for a moment, then typed some more. “Unfortunately, no superhero teams within reasonable distance are allowed jurisdiction within the Region.”

“What about unreasonable distance?”

“Hmmm.” More typing. “Ten thousand miles east, the Stonebreakers are based out of Couliau City. Due to a unique pact with the governor of Ironfile Isles, they may be able to undertake such a mission in the area.”

“Aaaah…”

“Hmmm?”

Bobbi glanced up to Dogoro’s brim. “Well? If that’s the best we got…”

“Sustra and I met the Stonebreakers prior to passing through here, and let’s just say things did not go very swimmingly.”

“So? They’re superheroes, right? They gotta do the right thing, right?”

Dogoro scoffed. “Heroes is laying it on quite thick. Couliau was taken over by supervillains. The Stonebreakers are just the enforcement arm of their little criminal kingdom. I would trust them sooner to try recruiting the vampire to their ranks than take her down.”

“Oh. Well that sucks.” Bobbi paused for a second, smirked, and said, “Pun intended!”

“Mmm.” The peacock man shrugged his wings. “Apologies. For right now, it seems there won’t be anyone available to lend assistance. Perhaps if–”

The door opened just then, and a woman stepped inside. A human woman, with short green hair, pale skin covered in soot and dried blood, sporting off-white leather armor that was absolutely shredded and soiled. Despite the apparent damage she’d taken, she walked in with an easy step, smiling cheerfully, and went up to the bulldog demihuman at the other side of the desk. The bulldog’s eyes widened, and he quickly snatched up a plastic bin from under his desk, setting it on the counter. 

The green-haired woman plopped down a sack soaked with black-green blood, which was still squirming. “Scratch one gorgon. Don’t worry, I tore out every eye, so it can’t do its little stone zap trick post-mortem.”

“You just left on hour ago!” said the bulldog, his voice gravely with age. “How in the hell did get it done that fast?” He gingerly touched the bag, sniffed at it, winced as the part he touched briefly bulged out, and muttered, “Cripes.”

The woman smiled. “Because I’m the best there is at what I do!”

“Your ass is showing,” Bobbi said plainly, pointing her butt.

The green woman blinked, twisted herself in a lurid pose to see that indeed, the backside of her armor had been torn away, leaving marks that implied something with huge, serrated teeth had tried to snack on her glutes. “Ha! Thought it felt a bit drafty back there.”

Bobbi popped a cloth banner out of her inventory, a plain white sheet, and tossed it to her. The woman snatched it out of the air, and quickly wrapped it around her waist as an impromptu skirt. “Thanks, kid!” She turned to the bulldog. “So! Got anything actually worth my time? I told you, I’ve gone rounds with the Oak Titan, I can handle the big stuff!”

The peacock sighed. “Yes, we are well aware of your reputation, Ms. Smith. Your battles with the Big Stuff tend to leave a Big Crater. The gorgon’s temple was considered acceptable losses in this case.” He glanced over the green haired woman’s seemingly unblemished form. Even the dried blood on her body didn’t seem to come from any wounds on her person. “Is there any of it left?”

“Um, well, the foundation’s probably still intact,” she said, grinning sheepishly. “Give or take a few massive cracks.”

Bobbi glanced up to Dogoro, who glanced back down to her, although his brim got in the way of making actual eye contact. Bobbi grinned. “How does battling a demigod eating vampire sound?”

The woman rubbed her chin. “Like how demigod eating?”

“Enough to keep one chained in her creepy basement for over a year!” said Bobbi.

The peacock typed at his keyboard. “Well. Considering the circumstances, I suppose this would be one case where maximum damage may be a benefit. And the land has already been evacuated.”

“So why didn’t you mention her before?” Bobbi cocked a thumb at the Weaponeer.

“She was dealing with the gorgon,” said the bulldog. “Another creature no one’s returned from. And raw strength never helped any other Drifters. How did you do it?”

Ms. Smith shrugged. “I got a few lucky dodges.”

“Mmm. Well. If you’re up for it, these two could use a proper wrecking ball.” The peacock gestured towards Bobbi and Dogoro.

“Sounds good to me!” She accepted a card from the bulldog, which she tucked away in a side pocket. “How much you offering?”

“How much you want?” said Bobbi, smirking.

“How much you got?” said Ms Smith.

“How much you wanna know?” said Bobbi.

Dogoro cut in. “Oh for god’s… Ms. Smith, we are will to part with 2500 credits for your assistance.”

The woman grinned. “If the fight’s fun enough, I’ll shave it down to two grand flat. And please, while we’re on the job, call me the Weaponeer.”

***

The team teleported up into the Sky Shark, where Sharkerbob was pensively waiting. He blinked as he saw the woman with green hair. “Jennifer?”

The Weaponeer blinked and grinned. “Well, well. Salvador Roberts. The prodigal god, back at it again!”

Sharkerbob blinked back. “You know me?”

“Of course I know you. We met in Blue Haven, remember?”

Sharkerbob blinked again. “You’re… that actually happened for you?”

“Sure. Why not?”

He had met the Weaponeer during the events of SalQuest, the adventure he had originally been written into before it got truncated into a canceled project. In that story, Salvador Roberts had awoken in a different version of the Endless Frontier, and had first run into a team of superheroes called Cavalry. Things had not gone well for the heroes of that reality, as the combined threats from dozens of worlds forced humanity and its superheroes into a protracted siege war. Jennifer Smith, the Weaponeer, had lent her superhuman combat prowess to the war, but had been temporarily stationed in Cavalry’s base when Salvador Roberts had gone to them.

Continuity-wise, Sharkerbob as he was now never technically experienced that storyline. But he remembered writing it. And he remembered that although the Weaponeer had started off in a distinct project of his, he had reused her in a few side projects, as well as SalQuest itself, making her technically one of his floater characters.

“So, how are you here?” he said.

She shrugged. “After the Animal killed you, the world around us shifted. Suddenly, Blue Haven and the whole of the Allied Free States, was off in some other part of the Frontier, and the enemy armies were elsewhere, mostly contained far off in their own regions. It was like the whole Frontier reset itself around us. The brainy guys later figured out our World Shards had just been added to this version of the Frontier in some kind of retroactive timewarp. I dunno, that kinda stuff is too out there for me to really care that much about the details.”

“So, Cavalry and all them…”

“Yeah, everyone’s out there, somewhere. As far as we can tell, a bunch of people killed in the war were revived as well. Time warp stuff again, apparently. To me, it felt like a big reset, like the great Author in the sky gave us all a mulligan.” She put her hands on her hips and gave him a curious once over. “Is that what you did?”

Sharkerbob pursed his lips. “I guess so. Or, rather, that’s what the real author decided.”

The Weaponeer quirked an eyebrow at him. “Real author?”

“We’re gunna have to keep re-hearing your little story over and over, huh?” said Bobbi. Dogoro popped off her head and floated over to the control console.

“Guess it depends on how many more folks we recruit,” said Sharkerbob. He looked to Weaponeer. “It’s a bit of a long story.”

“I got time!” she said, going over and sitting on the bed. “Let’s hear it.”

“Okay, well…”

***

Another long-winded explanation later, and Dogoro parked the Sky Shark about three miles from a lone tower in the distance, a large gray brick silo bent in a crooked configuration that couldn’t possibly be holding up just under its own weight. The surrounding area was a field of gray ash and the skinny skeletons of petrified trees. The sky overhead took on a sickly green-gray pallor, the sun dimming radically, casting even high noon in the shades of twilight.

“So what’s the plan here boss?” said the Weaponeer.

“I can’t sense her,” said Dogoro. “She’s alive, but trapped in a coma of kind. She won’t respond to my comm-spell.”

“Can you sense the vampire?” said Bobbi.

“Not at the moment.” He plopped himself on Bobbi’s head, then swiveled to face Sharkerbob. “Stay at the console. Be ready to fly us out.” The redhead nodded. He turned to the Weaponeer. “Your job will be to keep the vampire off me while I revive Sustra. Bobbi, you’ll go with me to help navigate through the tower, by which I mean, blasting our way through the walls.”

“My kinda strat!” said Bobbi with a grin, summoning a diamond pickaxe and a netherite sword into her hands. “Let’s hit it!”

With that, the trio went out the door to the garden balcony, leaped over the railing, and Dogoro carried them towards the tower.

They got within half a mile of the thing before a blur of darkness tried to smash them out of the sky. The Weaponeer intercepted the missile by summoning a sickle to block and hook a gnarly, outstretched claw and smoothly whip the attacker towards the ground. Dogoro released his hold on her, and she grinned wildly as she summoned a massive broadsword the size of a truck, arrowing down towards the figure who’d just made a small crater in the dusty field below.

The Weaponeer swung the sword in a huge arc, bringing it down onto the ground like a meteor, dust exploding into a cloud. Unfortunately, the blade just missed the creature by a hair, who rode the shockwave of the impact to get more distance and obscure itself in the cloud. The Weaponeer landed, planted her feet, then paused. With impossible grace, she twitched her head to the side, de-summoned the giant sword and parried a blindingly fast claw attack with a summoned rapier. As the creature’s claws sparked off the blade, Jennifer swung her arm, summoning a katana mid-swing in a savage slash that cleaved into the creature’s side. The blade caught on bone, and she drove the thing into the dirt.

The creature shrieked and flailed, gangly arms swiping desperately at the air. Its cloak fell away, and Jennifer could see it was indeed some kind of vampire, roughly resembling the classic Nosferatu. An almost bat-like head with long ears, a full row of sharp teeth, pale gray skin, beady red eyes. It shrieked and hissed at her, and then opened its mouth wide, the maw unfurling in a nightmarish blossom of gnashing teeth and rippling flesh. Rather than try to bite at her, it made a huge sucking sound as its distended jowls undulated. When nothing happened, the creature blinked, furled its hideous maw back to a semblance of normal, and gawked at the green haired warrior.

“H-how…” it rasped. “You just… human?”

The Weaponeer grinned. “That’s what it says on the tin! But the label might be a misprint!” She then whipped her rapier around and stabbed the creature right through the skull.

The vampire screamed so loud even the Weaponeer winced, before dissolving into a cloud of ash. And then that cloud of ash coiled into itself, and bolted like a snake towards the tower, tunneling right into the dusty landscape. The Weaponeer blinked. “Shit!” She dashed straight for the tower as well.

***

Whether it was the enchantments still holding on her tools, or Bobbi’s abilities from the game translating into some kind of super-mining skill, she found she was able to knock through the tower bricks at great speed. The building was as wide across as four skyscrapers clumped together, impossibly huge for its seemingly crude and simple construction. As soon as she got through the outer wall, she didn’t waste time trying to find stairs or doorways. She immediately just started digging right through the floor, shattering the gray stone to tunnel into the sub-basement dungeons.

Dogoro, meanwhile, focused his power on creating a force-field strong enough to bounce tank rounds off his or Bobbi’s hide, as well as layering on seals of holy protection that, theoretically, should work to burn any vampire that touched them. It certainly did the job on the swarm of lanky-looking bat creatures that tried to intercept them as they entered the dungeon levels. Their flailing attempts to grasp them left them howling in horror, their skin sizzling as they vanished back into the shadows.

Alas, the spells proved ineffective against the head creature herself, as Bobbi’s descent was suddenly intercepted by a thick cloud of ash exploding through the wall to tackle her down. The cloud solidified into the pale, gaunt creature, which shrieked as it unfurled its great maw. Dogoro bolted off Bobbi’s head and machine-gunned the vampire with sharp bursts of magic plasma. The creature staggered, but it refused to let Bobbi up. Instead, it greedily started sucking the magic shots into its gullet. Dogoro bolted back further to keep from getting caught in its pull.

Bobbi managed to twist one arm free and swung her netherite sword at the vampire’s neck. The vampire casually intercepted it, yanked the sword out of her hand, and snapped the thing in two, tossing the pieces aside. Then, without bothering to look, it stabbed Bobbi right through the chest with its claws, while continuing to suck harder toward’s Dogoro’s direction. The hat cursed as it began to get sucked in—

And then the Weaponeer cleaved the vampire in two with a claymore. The vampire’s two halves fell away before dissolving into ash and whirling into a cloud above them. Dogoro tried to bind the thing in a bubble of holy magic, but the cloud mass immediately started whirling around and banging off the walls of the mystic containing, weakening and cracking it within seconds.

Bobbi gasped and coughed, blood burbling up from the holes in her chest and from her mouth. Dogoro flew over to her, ready to cast a healing spell, but Bobbi managed to pop a red flask into her hand and pour its contents over herself.

The Weaponeer stood over her protectively, sword at the ready, but there wasn’t much she could do to a creature that could dissolve and reform, even after taking fatal hits.

“Blurgh,” Bobbi muttered as the heal potion worked its alchemy. “Why the fuck didn’t I pack any vanilla armor?” She staggered to her feet and gripped her pickaxe.

The Weaponeer gestured towards the contained cloud. “So how to do we handle this thing? If I can’t beat it down, and it just eats your magic, what do we have left?”

Bobbi popped three more bottles into her hand, all different colors from the previous potion. “Put a hole in the shield!” she said, even as she hurled the flasks at it. Dogoro managed to open a slot in the sphere, which the ash cloud immediately tried to surge out of, only for the bottles to shatter against it.

The cloud spasmed, and the mass fell in a liquid slop towards the floor. Bobbi hurled another two flasks, and the cloud turned into a sludgy oil before solidifying back into the vampire, who gasped and quaked. The creature glared at them with fury, and lunged at them, but its movements were sluggish, staggered, and pained.

“Have at ‘er, Jen! Those won’t last long!” Bobbi snatched up Dogoro and shattered another hole in the floor, dropping down.

The vampire’s roar of rage was cut off as the Weaponeer went for another tactic. She wasn’t sure if the ashing effect was something the vampire could do at will, or if it was a result of taking fatal damage. So instead of chopping her up, she ran up, hooked the vampire by the neck in a clothesline, and slammed her hard enough into the floor to crack the stone, stunning the creature. The vampire rammed all ten claws into Jennifer’s chest, then chomped its maw down on her skull, writhing teeth grinding straight to the bone, until the warrior’s head was about the crack. Jennifer grinned; she could take the punishment easily, her flesh regenerating almost as fast she took the damage. If it kept the vampire preoccupied, she’d let the thing wail on her a bit, while the other two found their target.

A few more moments was all it took as Bobbi knocked through to the final layer of the tower. Dogoro yelled, “Here! Go forward!” Bobbi dashed ahead, cleaving her way through even filthier walls of gritty stone, the halls now looking more like chitin-layered caverns then constructed catacombs. The material took slightly longer to cut through, but Bobbi went forward with relentless enthusiasm.

Finally, they burst into a wide chamber, where several old, wooden, bloodstained racks lined the walls, and rusted chains dangled from the ceiling. In the center, lashed spread eagle to a vertical slab, was Sustra. A demihuman skunk, unconscious, stripped bare, her fur matted and stained with blood and who knew what else, patches of scarred skin showing where repeated bites from the vampire had flayed her open, then left her to heal.

“Sustra!” Dogoro popped off Bobbi’s head and landed on Sustra. Bobbi for her part, took a few steps back from the entrance as the sheer stench of the room made her almost vomit. She turned and held her pickaxe at the ready, popping a diamond axe into her other hand, ready for the vampire to come charging at them.

“Oh, my poor girl… I’m here now, Sustra… I’m here…” Dogoro wriggled atop Sustra’s head, threads of magic tendrils snaking out from the brim to snap the shackles holding her. He gently floated her down to the floor.

The walls suddenly began to shudder. Bobbi glanced around nervously. “Uh… can we speed this along?”

Dogoro bathed Sustra in soft white light. “Her mana reserves are bled down into the red. This could take a few minutes just to wake her up.”

Bobbi held her breath, walked into the room, and popped two more healing potions into her hands, dumping both onto the ragged skunkgirl. After several seconds, Sustra twitched and let out a shallow breath. Her eyes fluttered open, but remained unfocused.

The walls shuddered harder. And then, the Weaponeer was bursting into the room, yelling, “She gave me the slip again! She’s in the walls somewhere and—”

And then, a red light erupted from the ceiling, two glowing orbs forming in the rock as the ceiling rose up higher, contorting into the face of the vampire, its expression twisted into a hideous snarl! “My meal…” it’s voice was a nerve-wracking vibration they could feel through the floor. “You won’t… leave… none of you will leave…!”

And then the face in the ceiling opened its maw, blades of stone pointing downward, as it rushed to crush them under the full weight of the tower!

They had seconds to act. The Weaponeer flashed two giant swords to her hands, leaped over to the other three, and held the swords up with the handles crossed, in an attempt to form a protective wedge. Dogoro flared up a force field. Sustra, perhaps by instinct, instantly shifted her shape, shrinking down to a normal sized skunk. And Bobbi, who realized any protection improvised would only delay the inevitable for a few seconds, grabbed her three companions and pulled them into herself. Not even knowing if this trick would work, she closed her eyes and waited for the blow. It was fast enough she didn’t even have time to feel it.

***

Sharkerbob pensively stood at attention at the console, straining his vision to see if they were coming back, or if the vampire was about to try breaking into the Sky Shark. He let out a shout and whirled as he heard a gristly gurgling behind him, and suddenly, Bobbi emerged from thin air onto her hammock. The girl flailed and fell off, hitting the floor, shuffling blearily on her hands and knees.

“Ugh… fuck… it’s worse than… ever…” she coughed as Sharkerbob hurried over and helped her to her feet.

“I guess that was your respawn?” said Sharker. “Jeez, we’re lucky that still works, and on a mobile bed, at that.” He paused, swallowed, then said, “Does that mean the others…?”

Bobbi waved him back, clutching her head and stomach like she was fending off a hangover from a weekend-long bender. And then, she closed her eyes and concentrated—and three figures popped into existence right on top of her, causing her to crash to the floor again.

The Weaponeer blinked, on her feet in an instant, short swords flashing into both hands. Dogoro dropped from the air to land on a particularly ragged looking skunk sitting on Bobbi’s back.

“Ha!” muttered Bobbi. “It worked!” She tilted her head up, grinning as she shook off the effects of the respawn. “Video game powers for the win!”

The Weaponeer, realizing where they were, vanished her swords and picked up the still unconscious Sustra with Dogoro on top. Setting the two gently onto the edge of Sharkerbob’s bed, she then helped Bobbi to her feet. “What did you do? Was that a teleport?”

“Sorta,” said Bobbi, shaking her head to clear the final lingering haze. “If I die, I respawn on the last unobstructed bed I’ve slept in. I hadn’t wanted to test it before, because respawning feels like I’m getting my whole body twisted inside out. But hey, now I know it works! Anyway, before I did that, I pulled you three into my inventory, which still carries with me when I die. Thank God.” She stretched out some kinks from having been landed on. “Sorry, that was kind of a big gamble. But it worked out!”

The Weaponeer grinned. “Hey, wing it’s my middle name!” She held up a hand. “Good job!”

Bobbi grinned and gave her a high-five. Then she looked back at Sustra. The demiskunk was still half-buried under her magic talking hat, who was currently bathing his companion in soft white light. “There, there girl,” he muttered. “You’ll be alright. Just drink in the mana, slowly now…”

Bobbi took a step forward to check on them, then wrinkled her nose. “While we’re healing her, can we give her a bath?”

Dogoro contorted his folds to glare sharply at her, and she decided it better just to back up. However, a moment later, a wash of blue light joined the soft white light, and Sustra’s fur suddenly looked substantially cleaner, the stink of a long-unwashed dungeon dweller clearing from the air.

Sharkerbob, meanwhile, was still at the console, gunning the accelerator on the Sky Shark, to substantially less speed than Dogoro had managed. He glanced towards the back of the ship. “Uh, Dogoro, is there any chance that thing could follow us? Or, more to the point, can you spare the healing long enough to get us at least a few Shards away?”

“HRMPH!” Dogoro gave Sustra one more look over, wriggling atop her. He looked about to tell his hapless host off, but Sustra mumbled something, and he seemed to think better of it. On the off chance the vampire could track her pray, she was likely going to beeline straight after them, and the Sky Shark’s regular speed wouldn’t hit the creature’s supposed territory limit fast enough to outrun her.

He turned to Bobbi. “Keep an eye on her.” With a gruff flap, he flew over to the console, practically batting Sharkerbob aside in his rush, and powered up the ship, blasting the sky base ten times faster towards the horizon.

Bobbi sat down next to Sustra, who curled up against her leg, curled her tail over herself, and promptly fell asleep. Bobbi pet her back soothingly a few times. Sharkerbob, not sure what else to do, took a seat on the same bed, but gave the two a little space.

The Weaponeer, meanwhile, sat down on the floor and stretched out, putting her hands behind her head. She grinned up at Sharkerbob. “You seem as out of your depth as ever.”

Sharkerbob let out a pensive breath. He hadn’t even left the ship, and he was almost feeling the crash down from an adrenalin high. While he’d waited, the seconds seemed to stretch for hours, but now that it was all over, he realized the team couldn’t have been gone more than five had maybe been gone for five minutes, tops. In hindsight, the incident now seemed over lightning fast. These three had faced some kind of demigod eating monster and seemed no worse for wear, while he was shaken up just seeing the state they’d come back in!

“You’ll get used to it,” the Weaponeer.

Sharkerbob wasn’t sure if he hoped he would, or if he hoped he’d never have to.

***

A little over three hours later, Dogoro brought the Sky Shark to a halt, figuring ten-thousand miles was distant enough the vamp would surely give up the chase, even if it could leave its territory. During the trip, he’d periodically checked on Sustra, sending a few bolts of healing mana her way. Eventually, she stirred from sleep and drowsily popped her head up to see what had happened.

Placidly, she stood and stretched, and then hopped off the bed, walking over to Dogoro, prompting him to halt their escape. He flapped down onto her back, and curled his brim around her, as she brought her tail up to curl around him. “Take it easy, my dear,” he said softly. She made a little squeak.

And then, suddenly, she was back in her demihuman form, standing nearly as tall as Sharkerbob. She turned to the others, glancing over them all with a placcid, almost blank expression. She was still naked, but her fur mostly protected her modesty. She bowed. “Thank you all for rescuing me.”

“No prob!” said Bobbi.

“Just doing my Drifter’s duty,” said Jennifer.

“Uh, sure thing,” said Sharkerbob, making a point to not look at her directly after an initial moment of eye contact.

“I am so sorry it took me so long to get to you,” said Dogoro. “It must have been awful.”

“I was unconscious or addled for most of it,” she said, her voice completely flat. “But yes, it was awful.” She glanced upwards and pat him gently on the brim. “And you? I threw you as far as I could once that creature stunned you. What became of you?”

“Ah. So that’s how I escaped,” he muttered. He glanced at the other three watching him curiously. “Hrmph! I must have been picked up by a peddler. This man here found me in some shop, being hawked like some cheap trinket!” He gestured with the top part of his hat towards Sharkerbob.

“Strange luck,” Sustra said.

“No kidding!” said the Weaponeer. She held out a hand. “Weaponeer. Jennifer when I’m off the clock. Pleased to meet you.”

Sustra shook her hand stiffly, then turned to the others.

“I’m Bobbi!” The Miner and Crafter Extraordinaire hooked a thumb back at the Sky Shark’s owner. “And the dude trying not to ogle you is Sharkerbob.”

Sustra nodded, and curled her wide tail around her front to cover herself. She didn’t actually seem bothered by the nudity, but she knew some species, humans in particular, were usually uncomfortable with it.

“He claims to be our Author,” said Jennifer, smirking at him.

“I see,” said Sustra, her tone maintaining its stolid banality.

“Hogwash, I think,” said Dogoro. “But he did do right by us, despite no other apparent motive.”

“I try,” muttered Sharkerbob. He went over to one of the Stasis Chests and pulled out some red cloth. He gestured Sustra over as he went to the Loom. “I can make you some clothes if aren’t able to magic some up yourself.”

“Alright,” she said, going over to join him.

“So now what?” said Bobbi. She looked to Jennifer. “Uh, I just realized we basically kidnapped you, huh? You need to get back to that city we picked you up from?”

The Weaponeer waved her off. “I was just passing through, took the gorgon job for some quick cash. And I’ll be collecting for this one now, if you please.”

Bobbi handed over the credits. “Okay, well, we should probably get ourselves oriented, at least. Find a city, rest up, figure out where we’re all going.”

Sharkerbob frowned. “Are you all… taking off?”

The Weaponeer sized him up. “You know, if you’re willing to provide transport, I might be willing to hang out with you guys for a bit. If you really are our Author going on some kind of meta-quest, then the best action is probably going to be coming to you.”

Sustra traded a glance with Dogoro. “We owe you a debt of our lives,” she said. “And we, too, are perpetual wayfarers, so we have no better place to be. If you’ll have me, I would like to accompany you on your travels.”

“We’re not talking an eternal life debt here!” gruffed Dogoro. “Just a temporary partnership.”

Sharkerbob nodded, but gave them a slightly sheepish look. “I’m going to be honest, I’m not sure how long I’ll be traveling. I’m very tempted to just find the most peaceful town I can find to just settle down in. But I get the feeling I’m not going to be allowed that.” He let out a ponderous breath. “I’ll be honest, I don’t have what it takes to be a full-time Drifter. But if you would like, if we’re suddenly going to become a little mobile Drifter party or whatever, I can at least provide this place as a base and transport.” He looked to Bobbi. “What about you?”

Bobbi strummed her fingers on her chin as she pouted in thought. “Well… to be honest… I was tempted to just also find a place to settle down in. I’ve done enough adventuring just to get this new life of mine. But I’m not sure what I actually want to do with my life yet, especially in this wackadoo world! I guess, if nothing else, I could give the Drifter thing a shot, myself.” She looked around the Sky Shark and gave a bit of a nostalgic smile. She went over and patted one of the walls. “Plus, to be honest, this is the closest thing to a familiar home I think I’m going to find right now, so even if it’s a bit crowded at the moment, I’d kinda like to stay here.”

“And here I thought you’d be dying to get away from me,” said Sharkerbob.

Bobbi grinned. “I’ll give you a couple days to prep before I mutiny.”

“Ha ha,” said Sharkerbob in a tone flat enough to rival Sustra. “Seriously, though, I’m fine to consider this vessel as much yours as mine.”

Bobbi sighed. “Aw, don’t be so sweet, it’ll be harder to betray you later!” The two laughed.

Dogoro wriggled a bit on Sustra’s head. “I can already tell we’re going to regret our oath sooner than later.”

“You aren’t actually obligated,” said Sharkerbob. “I’m not going to bind you to my service if you really want to be free to roam.”

Sustra shook her head. “I’d still like to help you for now,” she said. “If nothing else, I could use some more time to recover, and I’d be remiss to abuse your hospitality further without recompense.”

“I’m just in it for the challenge!” said the Weaponeer.

“Alright, then,” said Sharkerbob. He smiled at the group. “I guess for now, we’re doing the team thing.” He turned to look around the ship, frowning a bit in thought. He turned to Bobbi. “We’re gunna need more beds.”

She shrugged. “I don’t have that much lumber left,” she said. “Plus, I’d like to get a real bed for myself, too.”

“Then let that be our first mission,” he said. He turned to the console, and started flying horizonward at a much more reasonable clip, keeping his eyes peeled for a town. “The Quest for a Good Night’s Sleep.”

And thus, with a stalwart pack of allies oh-so-conveniently plopped right into his lap, Sharkerbob’s adventures in the Endless Frontier could truly begin!

END ARC